# My wife or my dog....



## Rlopez1200 (Oct 31, 2012)

Heres the story, me and my wife where seperated for a few months. While living on my own i adopted a puppy pitbull. He is 4 months old now. We got back together and my wife is pregnant now and wants me to get rid of him. She has 2 shihtzus and say 3 dogs and a baby are too much. She also says he is to dangerous to be around the baby. She said either i get rid of him or else shes leaving me and taking away my father rights..... What should i do???? I love her and him and our other 2 dogs tjeres no way I could just give him up.....








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## 331coupe (Oct 25, 2012)

Ask her if she needs help packing


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## Firehazard (Dec 4, 2009)

To each his own~

Look do you wanna trust them foo foo dogs to protect your family with your ferocity while your asleep or away? Food for thought..

APBT SBT AST "pit bull" is the nanny dog; Pete from the lil rascals in the 1940s was a champion fighting dog and grew up on the show with boys Our Gang become Lil Rascals.. In the show when the dogs had bandages that was from real bouts. President FDR had a box for bouts behind the white house. *Erase everything you know and rebuild it with out fear... * I am a father of 6 with a small kennel of dogs and even though they can be a pain in the butt everyone knows the % of home invasion and family casualties goes way down with them dogs..

It starts NOW.. Communication .. Dialogue (WHICH INCLUDES LISTENING) .. you need a professional to reassure her fear or gain her trust yourself. She obviously doesnt trust the dog or your opinion of the dog. TRUST FRIENDSHIP LOYALTY with out it you wont be on the same page ever and with out that well............your just not on the same page. FIND A COMPROMISE. Lil dogs bite kids far more than APBTs and most child K9 fatalities are from police dogs  of course you'll have to do your own homework because that doesnt get press like a pit bull attack. :hammer:

Every dog in the house needs to have a crate put the two lil dogs together they are just oxygen theives anyway.. IN all reality they should go because she hasa baby to coddle and need her attention now. see thats a two way street and compromise and understanding is how its met.

If you got back together and you wont choose to just flake off your dog its likely she'll test you with drama and emotion ... more of the same. If you want her to know shes all that matters to you in this world well... you wouldn't even have to ask the ? you did.

Compromise and move on or move on... conscious effort is required on both parties.....


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## Saint Francis (Jun 2, 2010)

331coupe said:


> Ask her if she needs help packing


Now I've got to clean the oatmeal off my screen LOL! Classic first post:cheers:


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## Odin`s_BlueDragon (Mar 11, 2012)

Firehazard said:


> To each his own~
> 
> Look do you wanna trust them foo foo dogs to protect your family with your ferocity while your asleep or away? Food for thought..
> 
> ...


:goodpost::goodpost::goodpost:

exactly what Stan said! u gotta put things in perspective. i understand that its a dog vs a human but seriously... thats a bitch move on her part. i always said that if a friend or boyfriend wanted me to choose between one or the other that the one doing the asking would be the one to loose. in this case ur "wife" is asking u to dump a dog that has never done anything wrong by her. not to mention if u do it, whats next? dump ur best friend? all ur friends? ur family? some people just like to be in control, not sure if thats how she really is, but thats how it sounds like by this action.

or if u like blunt one of these phrases might help, "kick rocks", "pound sand", "go piss up a rope", or as my dad loves to say "blow it out ur a**".


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## Rudy4747 (Nov 29, 2009)

That is a good post Stan. Look i had 4 dogs when we found out my wife was pregnant with our little girl. We would give them each time with mom before she was born. Then after she was born the same introductions. Now she is almost two and loves all our bulldogs. Not only that but she has better dog manners then kids twice her age. She will walk up to a person and their dog stand till they say she can pet them, then she puts her hand out to the nose befor petting. She loves the dogs and they now her place and importance in our house care for her and protect her with all they have, it is great. 

I would tell her to give it a chance and find a trainer near you that knows bulldogs. Invite her to come. Work it out and give the dog a chance. She will come around if you can get her to just try. Bulldogs ain them all over if given a chance


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## Rlopez1200 (Oct 31, 2012)

331coupe said:


> Ask her if she needs help packing


Lmfaoooooooooo

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## motocross308 (Oct 5, 2010)

she cant take your father rights . its not hers to take . Trick her into writing that down . A good lawyer will have a field day .


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## angelbaby (Feb 4, 2010)

I work with dogs all day long and I have bullys in my home with my 3 kids. I would never have any other breed in my home over bully breed with MY kids. Shitzus are one of the most notorious dogs for biting, I have been bit 4 times in the last few months 3 of those were shitzus. I would be more concerned over the smaller dogs with a baby then the bully. You have to do what you must I would never chose a dog over my kids but at the same time she needs to give too. I hate seeing dogs rehomed for this reason , breaks my heart. Is there any way you can work on a deal where she doesn't have to deal with the bully? crate train and leave in a crate when you are not there or cant supervise or a dog run for those nicer days. If YOU can dedicate a few hours each day { doesn't have to be all in a row} where you can exercise the dog and spend one on one time being crated should not be an issue and then that way she is not dealing with 3 dogs either. If the dog has obedience problems maybe work with her on that or go to some training classes, show her she can behave. Most all of us here have kids and if she is concerned about a hazard to the child we can all attest that is far from true. The key is to never leave your child unattended with ANY dog including her yappy little dogs .


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## ::::COACH:::: (Apr 4, 2012)

Show her these comments!! These dogs are amazing with children! To be perfectly honest I would be more afraid of the little foo foo dogs biting your baby than your bully breed dog...most of us here have kids AND these dogs. Also let her know we are always here to help you both out with any questions. 
Also, if you have to get rid of your dog...she needs to get rid of hers...lol come on lady be fair about this...without you that baby wouldn't be here...


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## Jazzy&Veronica (Mar 18, 2011)

My concern would be the ultimatum; that generally is not indicative of a mature, reciprocal relationship; at least not in this case - and it shows zero regard for your feelings.


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## TheIncredibleSocks (Sep 8, 2012)

From the sounds of it,if you do get back together,it's gonna be a horrible marriage probably leading to divorce.


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## American_Pit13 (Apr 23, 2007)

331coupe said:


> Ask her if she needs help packing


:goodpost: Damn straight.


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## MamaTank (Jun 12, 2011)

If my husband said that to me, I would send him packing. In fact, we're planning on trying for another baby next year. Hubby's only comment about the dogs- I can't wait to take pictures of the baby with Keira! 
Seriously, any dog can be aggressive. Unfortunately, LITTLE dogs are normally pampered and spoiled to the point where THEY run the home. I'm not knocking little dog owners-- I own a 15 pound Mini Poodle, and a 6 pound Min Pin/ Chihuahua mix. This would be like me telling my husband he has to get rid of his poodle-- OMG IT MIGHT EAT THE BABY! 
How about remembering for 2 seconds that they are ALL ANIMALS. Supervision, crating, and training make it all work out. But honestly-- if I was worrying about which one was going to bite the baby? Look at the one that is most attached to your wife. Consider it's training and level of socialization with infants and children. I really doubt there will be any trouble as long as you AND she stay on top of training and socialization.


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## rabbit (Jan 14, 2012)

motocross308 said:


> she cant take your father rights . its not hers to take . Trick her into writing that down . A good lawyer will have a field day .


haha yeah she cannot take your rights you have to sign them away. don't let her control you through scare tactics and immoral threats. I actually knew a guy that went out and got a bully mix. his wife was not happy. she pulled out statistics on "pit bulls" and made threats. it's been two years and now the dog is mostly hers lol. the guy let the dog change her mind. I don't think she gave him an ultimatum but relationships are about compromises not ultimatums.


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## ames (Jun 6, 2010)

I agree your pup will speak for itself. I also think its a bitch move of your girl and very very controlling. Also, get a lawyer fast. She already trying to use you kid as leverage and bribes its jot gonna change hen your baby gets here.

Worse comes to worse you have to rehome them all. She can't make you get rid of yours if she won't get rid of hers. That solution would be unacceptable for me since you made a
Commitment to the dogs it's not their fault there is a baby coming. You can make it work, but think really hard if you want it to work with someone like that.

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## Mila mommy x10 (Oct 15, 2012)

Tell her were the door is and tell her you'll be seeing a lawyer . Have her get rid of her dogs then if thats how's it going to be . I would say keep your dog he was there for you when she wasn't , and if you two break up again where will he be then ? Get a lawyer cause that's bs! Taking you fathers rights . A pitbull is gentle with babies and kids . It's the smaller dogs I'll be worried about . 

Keep him ! Or works things out . Good luck, she seems kinda nutty .


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## TheIncredibleSocks (Sep 8, 2012)

Any update on your situation?


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## QueenMissy81 (Nov 4, 2012)

I would call her bluff!! That's not right of her! Just down right controlling! And everyone is right in the previous comments. Hope it works out for you and him bc he's beautiful!!!

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## Rlopez1200 (Oct 31, 2012)

She hasnt really mentioned it so i guess well see how it goes lol, ill keep you updated....

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## tmack92 (May 22, 2012)

Jazzy&Veronica said:


> My concern would be the ultimatum;.


Ding Ding Ding, we have winner!!! If it didn't work out once before, its surely won't work when Ultimatums are involved... Stand your ground, if she truely loves you she will accept the pooch...


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## Annabelle (Aug 5, 2012)

Tell her to get rid of her dogs... Or you will get some other chicks ass lol get rid off the bitch

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## PibbleLover1225 (Nov 5, 2012)

What a dirty thing to ask someone to do. My dogs are like my kids. If a man asked me to choose between my kids and him the choice is obvious. Great post Stan!!! This is a ridiculous request. I have two children and would never have any other kind of dog around them. He checks on them before he goes to sleep and as soon as he wakes up. They're the best family dog you could ask for. I say this as mine is laying next to me and my 4 year old son on the couch snoring away!!!








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## Black Rabbit (Nov 14, 2009)

Stan had a very great post there, and it's 100% true. Statistically your child is way way more likely to be bit by the little dogs.


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## Shelby-N-Zues (Oct 21, 2012)

ames said:


> I agree your pup will speak for itself. I also think its a bitch move of your girl and very very controlling. Also, get a lawyer fast. She already trying to use you kid as leverage and bribes its jot gonna change hen your baby gets here.
> 
> Worse comes to worse you have to rehome them all. She can't make you get rid of yours if she won't get rid of hers. That solution would be unacceptable for me since you made a
> Commitment to the dogs it's not their fault there is a baby coming. You can make it work, but think really hard if you want it to work with someone like that.
> ...


I agree completely not good that she's already using the baby to try to force you to do things her way! I'd keep my dog over any man love me love my dog. I think I'd consider sending her on her way before I'd ever consider giving the dog away. Don't know the reasons for your split but something wasn't going right for the two of you how sure are you the marriage is worth saving? If you got him while you were split your obviously capable of taking care of him by yourself so I don't see why's hes an issue to her responsibilities. All I know is the DOG will never give you ultimatums or try to BULLY you!


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## jsgixxer (Mar 9, 2009)

We have a 3 week old newborn, and our Pit Bentley is great with her. Hes a great big brother


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## smokey_joe (Oct 14, 2005)

Did you think there was a chance that you would work things out with your wife and did you know how she felt about the breed before you got a pit bull? Manipulation works two ways. It's not fair that she's asking you to get rid of the dog, but you also have to look at the commitment you made when you got a puppy. That is a lifelong decision. Now that you are working things out, you are asking her to make a lifelong commitment, too. That, on top of having a baby and two other dogs. She is wrong in how she feels the pit will be with the baby, but your shits aren't really safe with the pit. They are an animal aggressive breed.This means that you will have to teach your pitty what a crate is and not be afraid to use it. They dynamics of your home will change. And this is not a decision that anyone can make for you, but the fact that you're asking the question about whether to keep your wife or dog on a public forum tells me you should probably keep the dog. When it comes to spending the rest of your life with someone, there should be absolutely no question. Just food for thought.


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## Wallies_momma (Oct 30, 2012)

smokey_joe said:


> Did you think there was a chance that you would work things out with your wife and did you know how she felt about the breed before you got a pit bull? Manipulation works two ways. It's not fair that she's asking you to get rid of the dog, but you also have to look at the commitment you made when you got a puppy. That is a lifelong decision. Now that you are working things out, you are asking her to make a lifelong commitment, too. That, on top of having a baby and two other dogs. She is wrong in how she feels the pit will be with the baby, but your shits aren't really safe with the pit. They are an animal aggressive breed.This means that you will have to teach your pitty what a crate is and not be afraid to use it. They dynamics of your home will change. *And this is not a decision that anyone can make for you, but the fact that you're asking the question about whether to keep your wife or dog on a public forum tells me you should probably keep the dog. When it comes to spending the rest of your life with someone, there should be absolutely no question. Just food for thought*.


Ya this, and especially the bolded part.


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## patty (Nov 11, 2012)

This is a hard one. You love them both and you will love your child. It is not right for her to say that you have to give the dog away. Is there any way you could meet in the middle ? Like see if you can keep him but have only parts of your property available for the dog? Or if you do decide to get rid of him, check to see if a family member is willing to take him in.


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## Cheytmo (Nov 10, 2012)

If you have to question it...get rid of the wife! :angeldevi


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## Cain's Mom (Oct 25, 2012)

Sounds like she needs to open her mind to your dog. Cain is 9 months and is so hyper. I have a 1 year old baby cousin and visit her frequently with Cain. As soon as he sees her he calms down and is so much more gentle with her compared to my 8 year old cousin who can stand her ground lol. All the kids in my family adore Cain and their parents never worry if he's going to be too rough with them because of how behaves he is around them. Like others stated, no one can make this choice for you. But we can all give personal experiences and hope it helps you with your choice.

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## Monroeandkaneendingbsl (Nov 10, 2012)

If she really loved yu she wouldn't tell yu to do such a stupid thing. If my husband said that to me I'd kick his ass to the curb!

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## PerfectPit (Aug 2, 2010)

I had to pts one of my dogs because he had DA (not a pit). After the last incident even though we were careful he broke his barrier and a dog fight occurred and my wrist was fractured in the altercation. I knew he loved my great nieces/nephews, they climb all over him, ate on his ears etc. no an issue but I couldn't risk a fight and the kids being caught in the middle. That same week the kids came over and I noticed a bad mark on his face. I was told MIL chi bit the 18mth old in the face and it was the 2nd time it happened with the kids in a week, the other child was a 6y/o. I called AC and had the dog removed. I would be more afraid of the smaller dogs biting then my pit. Stand your ground. It's an all or nothing attitude. Never leave a child unattended with ANY dog no matter how big or small.


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## Princesspaola21 (Oct 30, 2012)

The straw that broke the camels back with my last marriage was a dog. She was an absolutely gorgeous apbt. She was extremely aggressive human and dog. She attacked me twice when I was putting her out to go potty. She attacked my dog, my moms dog, and killed the neighbors dog, she growled and snapped at my 1 year old son, and thats just a few of the things she did. I waited till he took his dog out of the house and then I locked the door and told him he could come in but the dog could not. He moved out with her and we got divorced. That was fine by me! It's an awful story but I did what I had to do to protect my child. I felt so awful for that dog. I thought I understood why she was the way she was but I really didn't even know part of the story until later. She had been used for fighting regularly too. Pitbulls, bully's, staffs, mixes of the above they are all great dogs and you should not have to choose between her or your child and the dog unless a dangerous situation arises. Dangerous situations can occur with any dog from a great dane, German Shepherd, Chihuaha, or anything in between. In my case I don't think I should've had to asked he should've chose himself.

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## Celly_Cells_Kenya (Aug 27, 2012)

ugh, shes an emotional pregnant woman right now... tell her "yea yea ill get rid of ALL the dogs" but just never do it lol... the way i look at it, if you have to get rid of YOUR dog she should have to get rid of her lil shitheads (im mean shitzus) too....

pittie babies are the nanny dog... they allow kids to tug and pull and poke and all that becuase they have a higher tolerance for that stuff... a lil shitzu will have a fit and probably bite your toddler when he or she goes to tug on a tail....

btw, she cant take away you rights to your baby... thats a load of bs..... let her try and do that, boy oh boy would she be ready for a rude awakening....


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## harleyquinn (Nov 19, 2012)

obviously it isnt mean to be. there are two types of people in this world, pitbull people and non pitbull people. these two groups dont mesh well. she cant take your rights away with out good reason. if she is willing to leave over a dog, of which is one of the best breeds with kids and often called the nanny dog, then she is clearly unstable and maybe should have her parental rights taken away. she sounds like the type of person who would have a few skeletons in her closet work with that.


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## Black Rabbit (Nov 14, 2009)

Princesspaola21 said:


> The straw that broke the camels back with my last marriage was a dog. She was an absolutely gorgeous apbt. She was extremely aggressive human and dog. She attacked me twice when I was putting her out to go potty. She attacked my dog, my moms dog, and killed the neighbors dog, she growled and snapped at my 1 year old son, and thats just a few of the things she did. I waited till he took his dog out of the house and then I locked the door and told him he could come in but the dog could not. He moved out with her and we got divorced. That was fine by me! It's an awful story but I did what I had to do to protect my child. I felt so awful for that dog. I thought I understood why she was the way she was but I really didn't even know part of the story until later. She had been used for fighting regularly too. Pitbulls, bully's, staffs, mixes of the above they are all great dogs and you should not have to choose between her or your child and the dog unless a dangerous situation arises. Dangerous situations can occur with any dog from a great dane, German Shepherd, Chihuaha, or anything in between. In my case I don't think I should've had to asked he should've chose himself.
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Petguide.com Free App


There is absolutely no way that you wouldn't notice a dog being fought regularly. It would have scars and fresh wounds all the time if it was fought on a regular basis and there's no way you wouldn't see that if you lived with the dog. Dog Aggression is part of this breed. It was a trait they were originally bred for and is part of their genetics. People often think that dogs who are DA are that way because they were abused or taught to be that way but in most cases this is not true at all. Another thing people seem to be confused about is fighting dogs being human aggressive. While yes, we've all hear stories of the man bites these dogs were designed to be fearless fighters but docile and loving to their people and children. In no way does dog aggression = human aggression. Two totally different ball parks. Generally when dogs of this breed turn out human aggressive it's because of a medical condition or just bad breeding. There are dogs out there who go through tremendous abuse and still remain friendly and docile to people. That is their nature.


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## Princesspaola21 (Oct 30, 2012)

kg420 said:


> There is absolutely no way that you wouldn't notice a dog being fought regularly. It would have scars and fresh wounds all the time if it was fought on a regular basis and there's no way you wouldn't see that if you lived with the dog. Dog Aggression is part of this breed. It was a trait they were originally bred for and is part of their genetics. People often think that dogs who are DA are that way because they were abused or taught to be that way but in most cases this is not true at all. Another thing people seem to be confused about is fighting dogs being human aggressive. While yes, we've all hear stories of the man bites these dogs were designed to be fearless fighters but docile and loving to their people and children. In no way does dog aggression = human aggression. Two totally different ball parks. Generally when dogs of this breed turn out human aggressive it's because of a medical condition or just bad breeding. There are dogs out there who go through tremendous abuse and still remain friendly and docile to people. That is their nature.


I said she HAD been fought regularly. That was before he brought her to my house. She had scars and hair loss but he had all kinds of stories to explain it away. She never left my house again between the time he brought her and the time he left with her. The fact that she was ha was the reason she had to go.

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## TripTee (Nov 20, 2012)

331coupe said:


> Ask her if she needs help packing


this reply is gold i swear i almost peed myself _b


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## Cheytmo (Nov 10, 2012)

Princesspaola21 said:


> The straw that broke the camels back with my last marriage was a dog. She was an absolutely gorgeous apbt. She was extremely aggressive human and dog. She attacked me twice when I was putting her out to go potty. She attacked my dog, my moms dog, and killed the neighbors dog, she growled and snapped at my 1 year old son, and thats just a few of the things she did. I waited till he took his dog out of the house and then I locked the door and told him he could come in but the dog could not. He moved out with her and we got divorced. That was fine by me! It's an awful story but I did what I had to do to protect my child. I felt so awful for that dog. I thought I understood why she was the way she was but I really didn't even know part of the story until later. She had been used for fighting regularly too. Pitbulls, bully's, staffs, mixes of the above they are all great dogs and you should not have to choose between her or your child and the dog unless a dangerous situation arises. Dangerous situations can occur with any dog from a great dane, German Shepherd, Chihuaha, or anything in between. In my case I don't think I should've had to asked he should've chose himself.
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using Petguide.com Free App


GOOD POINT!:goodpost:
Accidents can happen with any breed...and any breed can be temperamental or aggressive. When I was 3, I had my face nearly bit off by a LAB!!! So using a dog as an excuse is ridiculous.


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## ThaLadyPit (Oct 12, 2008)

Her putting an ultimatum on you to out your dog just b/c she's pregnant is so not kosher. Hope that y'all can work this out for the betterment of everyone involved. I'm with everyone else, if your dog has to go, so should hers. I've never re-homed a dog due to pregnancy or b/c my other half wasn't happy. While dogs can be stressful sometimes, considering the time you have to put in to them for training and care, it's no more stressful than raising a baby. I've worked with dogs for many years (vet's offices, boarding kennels, grooming salons, doggy day care facilities), and the only dogs that have ever bitten me have always been small dogs. Even throughout my childhood, my mother chose to raise Chis and Mastiffs and every mutt in between. The small dogs were always the problem. The bigger dogs never gave us any problems. In my adult life, I've owned small dogs like Chis and terrier mixes, Boxers, APBTs and mixes thereof, as well as other breeds like labs, rottie mixes... the smaller dogs were always the issue. 

The point being, the Shih Tzus will be more likely to cause harm to the baby than the bully will. I don't know your wife's dogs personally, but I'm betting if this is the first pregnancy, the dogs more than likely haven't been socialized around children and don't know how to behave around children, which raises the risk of them biting the baby when he/she is old enough to crawl on, pull their tails, poke their eyes, etc. 

Sorry for the long winded post, but I hope I've helped you to come to terms with the situation and hopefully y'all can work things out.


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