# My new Bully baby has a serious problem



## RemiBlu (Feb 21, 2015)

I have a 10 week old female American Bully. Her name is Remi Blu. Remi is short for Remington in honor of her mother who was a duck dog and wore a Remington Shotgun collar like it was her grandmother’s pearls. I chose Blu because it was her mother’s name. Remi is smart, loving, playful... but she has severe abandonment issues. Here is her long but necessary story and I thank those of you who take the time to read it and offer any suggestions to help my baby girl. 
Remi came from an exceptional line of hunting/tracking and working dogs. Her breeder was the go-to guy in north Louisiana to keep many hunting clubs in business with quality working dogs. All 10 of the litter were bred specifically to be guide/trail dogs and bird dogs for a hunting club up state. Remi's mother was a well-known duck dog in Louisiana and her father (Duke) is a great hog catcher in Texas. 
When Remi was 2 weeks and 4 days old, the property she lived on was vandalized during the night by a man who was very angry at the breeder for refusing to make a sale to him. We can only assume this man intended to steal dogs or destroy the property of the breeder on this night. Blu got involved and tried to defend what was hers. She was shot and killed. The owner jumped in and he was shot as well. He is now home and recovering from surgery, but he had to be hospitalized for weeks after the incident.
The litter was picked up by a no kill rescue over 100 miles away from the property because it was the only one that could accommodate round the clock care for 10 pups immediately. I volunteer at that shelter and I believe fate hand delivered Remi to me. I had barely entered the shelter door the following morning when I was handed a tiny black handful and a dropper and told to do what I could. On a sad note, we lost 4 of Blu and Duke's puppies and the shooter is still missing. Anyway, I took what was barely a puppy home with me and cared for her day and night until she was old enough and strong enough to do the job herself. In the weeks that pass, she became a strong, stubborn 6 week old. The rescue owner asked me to come in and take photos of the litter so they can start getting the word out that they will soon be ready for adoption. Without thinking about it at all, on autopilot, I entered the shelter and announced, “She belongs with me after all we have been through together.”
Almost all of our rescues are surrenders. Army families arrive here not knowing there is a “Dangerous Dog Ban” of many specific breeds. So we get many crying kids and heartbroken adults turning over their beloved pit breeds, chows, rotties, huskies, etc. to us. When taking in these dogs, we are able to gather info on the parents and owners and find out the dogs habits. So I called the litter’s owner who had recently agreed to surrender the pups because he was unable to work, much less care for 6 dogs. He told me all about the litters parents and grandparents and cried as he did so. 
Remi is now 10 weeks old. All of her siblings now have good homes. She is smarter than I am and so loving and easy going. She loves our kids and our 8 year old Shih Tzu, but she loves me the most. That's the big problem! If she can’t see me or touch me, she screams until she gags and vomits, then screams some more. She doesn't want my husband or kids or my other dog. Only me. I can't pee without taking her with me. She can't pee unless I am standing next to her. I work a full time job, I freelance and volunteer. I have to leave her every day, but I can’t convince her that I’m coming back! This baby is hurting. Can she be traumatized by something that happened when she was 2.5 weeks old that she can’t possibly remember? I work on an Army post that has a training facility for working/service dogs for the Army. I’ve enrolled her in a basic obedience program that starts in 2 weeks. I have no answers at all and feel completely helpless. All I can do is ask other owners and hope that someone had a similar problem, or wait and see if her obedience training will help build her confidence and her trust. I would never abandon her. I have to leave her behind each day, but when will she see that I will always come back and shower her with attention? I want to use this program to transform her into a well-balanced service or therapy dog over the next 2 years. She is special and a fighter and I want to see her change lives. I saved her life, but she renewed mine and I owe her the very best life possible!


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## BCdogs (May 30, 2014)

Wow, what an unfortunate thing to happen to everyone involved. Sorry to hear that.

My guess is that it's not so much traumatization from the event itself, but probably from the following weeks where she spent much of her critical development period in a chaotic environment without her mother and the only person she knew. That was probably the most traumatizing part. She probably lost out on a lot of socialization and time with mom and littermates, which are very important.

I would treat this the same as usual separation anxiety. Is she crate trained? That's definitely the first step I would suggest if not.

Here is a good link to help explain what it is and how you can start to work on it:

Separation anxiety in dogs


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## RemiBlu (Feb 21, 2015)

She will stay in the crate quietly... as long as she can see me. For weeks I had to put my hand or foot into the crate to keep her in it quietly. I tried tough love and put her in the crate in the den and went to bed. 2.5 hours later my husband and kids were begging to let her sleep with me so she would hush. Now I can go to bed, but I have to stay in her sight. When I wake a 3am to go to the bathroom, she doesn't whimper or cry, she screams like her leg is cut off. Baby steps I guess, but it's hard on my family when I go to work each morning. They have to deal with her "panic attacks". When i am with her, she is the most normal, happy, playful dog you have ever seen. It's killing me. Thank you so much for the link. I want to gather all the info I can.


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## RemiBlu (Feb 21, 2015)

As you can see in the picture, she clings to my other dog like nothing I have ever seen. She has to love him and hug him 24/7... if I am home. If I am not, he can't comfort her. He tries. He will lay with her or next to her kennel for a while until he has had enough.


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## BCdogs (May 30, 2014)

What have you been doing as far as socialization? If she is vaccinated I would definitely start taking her out and exposing her to new places/smells/people. One of the most important things socialization does for a dog is help build their self-confidence.


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## TeamCourter (Oct 22, 2013)

I would say she has separation anxiety because you raised her from the very beginning and doesn't know how to be away from you. I would work on this asap while she is still young. Try to be consistent with the crate training, and only let her out once she is quiet. Also try having your husband and kids do stuff for her while you are home, have them feed her, playing with her, take her outside, etc. She should learn that she doesn't have to be with you 24/7. Hopefully others will have some more stuff to add. 
Oh and she is adorable by the way


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## jttar (Jan 31, 2013)

Good advise already. Especially letting other family members take over feeding and taking the dog out to do it;s business. This will not only help to break that reliant bond on you but will help socialize the pup more. 

Most of us have gone through the sleepless nights when getting a puppy and listening to it act out because it wants attention. The very first time you react to it by scolding or even saying "no", the dog has won. You said yourself how smart the dog is and believe me, the dog knows how to get what it wants now. 

Don't take this the wrong way but you partially to blame for the dogs insecurity by giving into it's demands. My advise would be to follow the suggestions gave already and slowly let the dog sever the need to be with you every second. Practice when it;s not the middle of the night by putting the pup in it's crate and walking out of the room. When you put the dog in the crate, and this is important, don't say a word or pet it. Just put it in the crate, lock the door, turn and leave the room. Of course it is going to whine, wail and scream. Don't respond to it. When there is a couple of minutes that the dog is quiet, walk into the room, open the crate door and walk out of the room, again without saying anything to the dog. Repeat this as many times as you can during the day. At night same routine. you may need ear plugs but don't give in. The dog is smart and knows that it's controlling you. You need to turn that around in the other direction and every day you wait it is just going to be more of a problem. not only for you and your family but also the pup. 

Stop letting it go everywhere with you. Go to the bathroom and close the door to keep the dog out. I'm not suggesting anything mean but my advice would be to start being firmer with the pup and letting it know that it's whining and screaming tantrums will not get her what she is demanding from you. Now is the time while she is just a pup. 

Thanks for the pictures --- she is cute as a bug.

Joe


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## RemiBlu (Feb 21, 2015)

I agree jttar. I am to blame. And I am not making excuses, but love got in the way of good sense and I have allow her to get what she wants because my heart overtakes my mind. She is incredibly smart. She knows exactly what to do to get her way... out of the crate and into my lap. The little poop even seems smug and proud upon doing so. I got into the habit of taking her with me to the bathroom during the night because her screams wake my entire family. But last night, we all agreed that I need to "man up" and take control. My husband is making it his mission to take her to the park where there are lots of dogs, kids and fun while I work each day to help socialize her. I know that because of her very bad start at life, I have babied her from day one. I know I created this little terror. We had a family meeting in the bathroom as I got ready for work at 4:30am while she screamed because I was in the bathroom without her. We agreed to all lay down the rules and stick to them. She may be my sweet, stubborn baby now, and she will forever be my baby, but a 12 pound baby is easy. A 60 plus pound baby will be impossible. I WILL get her in check. I have to stop having a poor Remi pity party when she panics upon me leaving her. I did this. I can and will undo it. I appreciate all comments, and you can't offend me by speaking the truth. I entered this site for her well being, not for my pride. I have never nursed a pup back to health. I have never owned a pup. I have never owned a large dog or any bully breed. I have never trained a pup. I am new to all of this. That is why I am here. Every dog I have ever owned has been an older, usually trained, rescue except for the Shih-Tzu in the pictures. He belonged to a fam member and I got him already obedient and social. Remi (and her brother) is the most amazing, smart, loving, good thing in my families world and we will fight for her. Even if that fight is essentially against her, but for her own good. I mean, look at that face!!! I get crazy love from that face every day the second I enter the door. How can you not love it and fight for it?


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## jttar (Jan 31, 2013)

Makes me sincerely happy that you and your family had the discussion and that you are so eager to learn and change things Chrissie. Stick to your guns and your family and RemiBlu will be the better for it. I personally appreciate your great attitude and hope that you stick around this forum and continue to learn and share pictures of that cute pup so we can watch it grow into a wonderful stable dog.

Joe


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## DogGoWoof (Apr 7, 2015)

I know this is a bit late and I don't have all that much to add, I just wanted to say that my pup also had a lot of separation anxiety and was CRAZY attached to my stepmom but over a long period of tough love and crate training we broke him out of it. It really just comes down to not reinforcing negative behavior. I really hope things with Remi are going well!


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## RemiBlu (Feb 21, 2015)

It's ok that you are a bit late. Your input is very much welcome! 
Since my post about Remi's terrible anxiousness in February, she has grown up quite a lot mentally and physically. I have put her into obedience school and I socialize her every chance I get during the week and every weekend without fail. While she still gets anxious about me leaving the house, she gets into her crate now with just the simple prompt of "night-night" and she knows I will see her again when I get out of the shower, return from the store, or wake the next morning. Her panic attacks have gone from 110% to maybe 20% now. I spend more time playing and working with her than some people (who do not have dogs and their opinions do not matter) think is healthy. I can promise that my little girl is happy, healthy, and MUCH more secure with herself and with life. And because of that, I am happier than I have been in many years! She really is my greatest joy. I, just 2.5 months ago, thought she might be a lost cause. She has made remarkable progress in that time.







pic.twitter.com/0cXO9i8ePn


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## ames (Jun 6, 2010)

I am so happy to hear this! And so glad your hard work is paying off. That makes it so worth it. And don't let people make you feel bad about spending time with your pup. My boy is the best company and such a great listener i would choose him over a lot of humans lol


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## pittieparty (Feb 25, 2015)

What a moving story. I'm glad for you and your pup. My advice doesn't stem from my baby's separation issues, so much; no whining, chewing anymore, that just seemed to come with time, exercise, and training that built relationship. But a couple people here already mentioned having other people feed and walk and care for your pup, not just you, and I think that's a really good idea. You said your hubs is taking him to have fun outside every day. When my boy got growly, actually starting to act like a junkyard dog towards people entering the living room where we were sitting on the couch...Occurred to me we were spending so much time together, since I work from home, and we sleep together, we were getting too enmeshed. When I was fostering another pit, I got 11 stitches in one hand, and sprained fingers in the other pulling them apart by myself in a field--that was fun, not! But anyway, I needed help walking him, and it totally changed him. Several people stepped up, and he became a much friendlier dog to everyone. He clearly is a walk whore, will growl, or look at someone with cold suspicion, until they dangle a leash, and then he's ready to be their best friend. And it generalized to everyone. Even though he is around other people all the time, as I have housemates, it wasn't until other people were walking him, that he became friendly and balanced again. I just bet it would apply to your situation with your pup, too. 

I'm glad to hear things are progressing well.


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